Family Life

Dad reveals his survival technique when his wife goes out of town, and it is hilarious

Mums are pretty good at dealing with high pressure scenarios. 

You know like juggling five children, a husband and the morning routine all at the same time, while completely keeping our cool. 

It's a war zone and if you make it out alive you are a modern day hero, yet, nobody seems to notice but you. 

That was until one mum had to take a work trip and leave her husband at home with the kids, and boy, how he has been enlightened to the world of mornings with children.

Writing for Hiding in the Closet with Coffee, Amy, reveals that her husband, Todd, went through the events of the morning as he took over the daily routine, and it cracked us up. 

In typical dad fashion, Todd followed the list which was left behind but added his own unique spin on things. 

"Alarm went off. Too damn early. I knew I needed to get three of my five kids up and ready for school. After brainstorming ways to do this without actually getting out of bed, I settled on 'pinging' their iPhones with the Find My iPhone app."

"Despite it saying their phones were offline, I tried several times before actually submitting to leaving my nice warm bed and physically waking them up."

Referring to the agenda, Todd figured out where his kids get picked up, dropped off, given cash, and who eats what for breakfast and lunch. 

However, this too proved to be a complicated process… but it's fine, Dad was nowhere near breaking a sweat. 

Todd made coffee, listened to the girls fight, handed his son a box of cereal and suddenly realised the paperwork his son needed signed for school was actually meant to be done yesterday. 

"I’ve got this. I decide to leave this for my wife to help me with when she returns from her trip. #handled."

The kitchen was a mess, but Dad took the initiative, deciding that this mess could wait until a couple of hours before his wife returns – no panic, it's breakfast time, got to get those bagels on. 

"Burn the bagel I put in the toaster for my daughter. I think I hear her refer to my wife as 'the glue that holds us all together'.”

"Went to great lengths to transfer money into school lunch accounts so I wouldn’t have to pack lunches. Couldn’t figure it out and had to text my wife to help me. She figured it out from another state. #winning."

Life was moving along nicely for dad until he realised his older kids needed cash for homecoming; but he doesn't carry cash, which in turn involved a text to work to state he was going to be a little late this morning and a school drop off because they missed the bus. 

"I told them I’d drop [the cash] off at school after getting everyone out the door. First wave of kids gone, second wave up. Hard getting them up because of our late night chocolate candy bar run the night before, and they're a little tired."

After a shorts-finding debacle, a convenience food day, another school drop off and a few list referrals, dad was well on his way to winning this morning thing mums go on about. 

"Back home to get myself ready. Need cash. Stop at the [shop] to take advantage of the no-charge ATM. And okay, to get a breakfast sandwich. Settled on an egg and cheese burrito."

"Drive to the high school to drop money off for the older girls. This burrito is better than expected. Parked in the parking lot and put my daughter’s name on the envelope. Dang, this burrito is good."

Todd walked to the office, dropped the envelope and money, text his daughter to let her know it was there, went back to the car to finally leave for work, and enjoy the last of his burrito. 

But the burrito was the only thing Dad could think about: "And Kwik Trip is right there, so despite being late for work, I pull back in and buy one more egg and cheese burrito. I’m not kidding…. it’s so cheesy!"

"A perfect ratio of egg and cheese."

And there you have it, mums, the act of survival; we need to start taking a leaf out of the book the dads in our lives follow – never break a sweat, it's all good. And if all else fails, just eat a burrito! 

Would you like to be part of our Mums Who Inspire series? Simply email mumswhoinspire[at]magicmum.com and we'll feature your story (and, no, you don't have to be the best storyteller to get involved!).

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