Mum's Life

Mum on maternity leave asked to pay half on bills sparks anger online

Maternity leave should be a time to wind down from work and get ready for the imminent arrival of your new baby.

However, one mum has turned to the Internet for advice when her partner asked for continued 50-50 payments towards the bills.

Taking to mumsnet, the mum-to-be explained the situation:

"I have discussed this with my partner and he would like me to continue to contribute half towards the mortgage and bills while on maternity leave.

"To do so I will need to use a redundancy pay out that I was given during the first stages of pregnancy. He earns a very high wage."

Mums were quick to reply with anger towards her partner's suggestion.

"Maybe you could suggest he takes paternity leave and looks after baby full time and pays 50 percent of everything while you return to work and your full income," said one mum.

Another chimed in: "Is the baby not his then? This makes no sense whatsoever to me. You're on maternity leave because your having his child and he wants you to continue to pay half the bills.

"Who's going to pay for childcare when you return to work?"

Users also raised their concerns about his commitment to the pregnancy and relationship.

"If a man isn’t willing to support his partner while she has their baby then I regard his as a lost cause. Why have a baby in a relationship if you are still expected to go it on your own?

"As part of your discussion, make it clear that expecting you to continue paying half would mean your sole job is taking care of the baby and you shouldn’t do anything else in working hours in case he expects to suddenly have an unpaid housekeeper as well as an unsupported new mother at home."

Others recommended sending him a bill for looking after their child.

"Hmm. Will you be invoicing him for his share of the childcare?" asked a mum.

"Charge him for childcare, don’t forget NI & pension contributions & holiday pay when calculating the daily rate," added another user.

However, some mums agreed with the dad-to-be.

"I also paid my half both maternity leaves.

"The minute I knew I was pregnant I saved and put aside all my personal Direct Debits and the amount I'd of paid per month for my half of the bills and mortgage. My other half did foot the joint credit card which was for food, baby stuff etc. I did have to go into some other saving sometimes to fund going out during the day," said one mum.

Another explained how she shared half of the finances during each of her maternity leaves.

"I did. Every single time. I saved, in order to ensure that I had a reasonable amount of 'income' available to me during the year I was off – once my contractual maternity payments tapered to statutory only.

"My independence has always been really important me though and I accept not subscribing to the idea of family money that is so prevalent on mumsnet makes me a bit of an outlier in terms of this conversation."

Do you think her partner is right in asking her to split the bills?

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