How to handle constant fighting between siblings

Sibling fighting can be one of the most troublesome aspects of parenting and a lot of mums find it hard to deal with. In some instances, kids have the ability to work out their differences themselves but sometimes you will have to intervene.

When your kids do start to fight, it is important that you stay calm. This will help teach your children to manage their emotions. Don’t take sides and don’t focus on who started the fight – treat them both the same.

If there is one person in particular who is always the instigator, it may help to talk to them in private to find the root cause of the problem. If you need to, separate them temporarily until they have calmed down. Remember, siblings usually do want to play with each other but they are just not able to resolve conflict.

If one is physically hurt, tend to their wounds but don’t pass on judgement about who did it. Once everyone is calm, sit down with them together and talk to them about how they felt during the fight. Help them to understand their feelings and get them to listen to each other. Remember they are kids and just because they fight now doesn’t mean that they won’t get on in the future.

Preventing your kids from fighting in the first place can lessen rivalry and squabbling. Make sure you don’t compare your kids to each other and try to give everyone individual attention. If you find that your kids are starting to get bored of each other, step in before it becomes a fight.

Your children don’t have to share everything, so try and make sure they have their own space. Don’t give older children the responsibility to care for their younger sibling as they may feel they have a certain ‘power’ over them. Instead tell them that mum and dad enforce rules and discipline, not children. Make sure you teach them how to be respectful and take turns.

As they get older your kiddies will be able to work out their differences themselves. However, in the mean time make sure you give them the tools and skills they will need to help them in the future.