MagicMum.com

Hi girls

Just looking for a bit of advice here.

I met a guy nearly three weeks ago and we clicked instantly. Had a great laugh together and arranged a second before the end of our first date. He makes me laugh so much and I make him laugh too. He is very affectionate and gorgeous and a great kisser - they are the good points

But

he is so uncontactable - he has a work phone and a personal phone and I can never get him on either. He rang me one time and I said I will ring you back in literally one minute (was saying goodbye to DD going to school) and I rang him about 30 seconds later and phone turned off.

We make arrangements to see each other in the evening and I get my mam to come up and baby-sit thinking we are going out bout 7 but he ends up doing things and gets delayed and we don’t end up seeing each other till about 9.30 and I am home and all by 11.30 cause he wants me to get off the roads cause it is icy.

I think this weekend was the final straw. I told him during the week that Sunday he had to make a big effort and do something nice e.g. go for lunch or dinner and a walk in GlenaaLough together cause when we meet up it is only really for one drink or even just sit in his car and talk in a car park or he goes home sick with sinusitis so Sunday was important for me cause I wanted him to make a bit of a fuss over me.

But he rang yesterday at 9am and told me he is in bed very sick with sinusncus - he was meant to spend the day with his friends in Croke Park to watch the match but said he didnt go - but I rang him all day yesterday and text him just to see how his head was and he texted at midnight and said "Hi babe x" and I wrote back "are you for real" so he rang immediately and I said where were you all day and he said he was sick so he got off the phone after 2 mins and that was it .

Then this morning he rang at 9am so say he is on his way to the on call doc as he is no better and that’s the last I have heard. I text to see if he was ok and no text back and then I rang to see if he was ok but no answer from either phone.

What do you think - part of me is pissed off but then the other part of me thinks well you are with him for 2 weeks so get over it - I just thought he should have text me to tell me what doc said or ring to officially cancel today cause I was waiting around to think he might get better and the date will still go ahead.

What do you think?

He is at best playing the field, or more likely married.

Move on before you get hurt.

He is married!

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The smallest boy is 3
The bigger boy is 4
They have a little baby sister

Sorry hun but it does sound like he might be married or at the very least has other issues.

+1

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I'm not FAT, I'm just too wide for my height!

Kerrymom - the ultimate Topic Killer

I think a couple of things.

1. Its only 3 weeks, and it sounds like you are very intense very quickly (on your side)
2. He is either with another woman, or isnt on the same page as you when it comes to contact, spending time together etc.

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My diva is 4 years old.
My young man is 12 years old.

If I met someone three weeks ago and they were already on me about my phone usage and availability on the phone and demanding a special day to be made a fuss of, I would be running for the hills...........that is a gut reaction to your post, and I know not what you want to hear

Most likely married. Turn around and walk away as fast as you can.

Yeah my initial thought was he was married. But then, you met, what 2 weeks ago? or 3? Nearly 3 but 2.

TOO SOON! Go easy for goodness sake.

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My first thought too

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ds1 july03
ds2 mar05

Married. For sure.

Hi girls

thanks for your advice

If you think I am demanding then I will take that on board and will try and pull back but he was telling me that I want to introduce you not as my girlfriend but as my partner so he was intense as well. Telling me he could us being together for a long time

The whole Sunday making a fuss thing was really a bit of a joke between us but I do think I am worth more than one hour in a car park or one coke in a pub - why not go for a meal.

Honestly dont think he is marreid cause he has a daughter and his ex is making his life a misery messing him around with access for his DD but is very uncontactable.

So will I run for the hills

This is the first person I have met since my mariage broke up a year ago so this is all new to me. Been on a few dates but this is the first person I really like

Why has he 2 phones anyway unless he is a dealer?
Stop contacting him altogether. It's the hardest thing to do but you'll have to. You've been through a lot, its not easy. Best of luck.

Dp has 2 phones and he's not a dealer. Is he?

First thought he is married . Second thought you are way too intense after such a sort time . I don't think you are both on the same page at all . Play it a lot cooler and ask him straight if seeing someone else .

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He's either married or hes just not that into you. Also think you're coming on a bit strong and glad you're going to take a look at that yourself. Why would he introduce you as a partner when youre not his partner? That's just weird. I'd delete his no and move on.

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1 big boy, 13
1 small boy, 8
1 tiny boy, 3

You might be the last to find out! My dad worked with a man and he was shocked to find out his wife was dealing, they were married for years! He finally clicked one morning, he was heading out to work and the phone rang, and some guy whispered down the phone "is that dope gone yet?"

viewtopic.php?f=68&t=385402
have a look at this thread i posted last week.
my friends bf also had lots of excuses and weird behaviour.
please listen to your gut instinct. something is not right here.if he was so into you he would want to see you and talk to you all the time.give him a miss you will be glad and free to meet someone who really cares about you.

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you can't pull yourself together until you've fallen apart.

Just saw your second post and alarm bells ringing I would run like the wind . Intense to quick and really not making a effort he is just not that into you and you will end up being used and feeling used

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Appartenly the two phones is cause one is for work and one is personal - he doesnt tell work he has the other phone so if he doesnt want to be contacted by work he turns that phone off

believable ???

Yeah I will back off cause as I said this is the first person I have liked in a year since my ex left and I am unsure of the "dating rules"

I can accept if he is just not that in to me but when we are togheter he doesnt give that impression but yeah you could be right

The whole part of the partner thing was i think him trying to say I mean a lot to him but obviously not

Yes. Chill out.

God this is not a funny story really but it made me laugh!

OP - either he's in another relationship or just feels like you're moving too fast. Stop hounding him, stop meeting him for a coke/chat in car park etc. just say "ah I won't bother if it's just for an hour". Start demanding more without actually saying it. He'll either up his game or walk and it's better to know now.

Are you a Facebook friend, by the way?

Agree completely. It is far to early for you to be making these kind of demands on him. He might be feeling a bit overwhelmed.

Nothing wrong with having two phones either.

But you're not his partner are you? So what's he playing at?

It's all weird. You are both OTT in different ways. Sounds very strange to me! After 3 weeks I would be expecting to still be getting to know someone, fairly light hearted, enjoying each other's company, none of this pressure or paranoia.

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Two lovely girls aged 3 and 1