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I'm starting to get a knot in my stomach as I've realised i just can't afford to keep the bills.
I have always worked as soon as I got qualifications and that's nearly 18 years ago! not one day on social welfare or any help at all.
I did it all right, purchased a house (sml 2 bed) for myself and my baby, got a creche and kept working. I thought I was doing it all right.stayed in a job that's demanding and horrible atmosphere but it paid the bills.
However with a cut in wages now and double the work I'm exhausted and tired and so emotional. I was turning a blind eye for the last while on how much was going out and realising that each month it was getting tighter and tighter.Bills had to be paid.
I don't go out /drink, don't buy new clothing, don't have holidays anymore (stay with relatives in country and that's it) and don't buy stuff for the house.
I hate where i'm living,it was meant as just a starter home and it's now even 50k depreciated so I can't sell. I keep thinking if I hadn't bought a house and had this over me, and I didn't have to pay creche fees 'cos I have to work, that I'd be better off on social welfare.
I don't get medical card or even gp card. nothing and I am stressing myself now wondering how I'm going to cope.My child was sick this morning and I was praying i wouldn't have to go to doc as it's 50euro!! that's crazy.
I thought in time I'd meet someone and sure we'd be able to live with two incomes coming in. Or just the support even.But I haven't. So I'm alone and worrying everyday about how I'm going to survive.
All the bills have been paid now this month and I have 50 euro to last me until I get paid which is 2 weeks away. No banks are giving loans and even at that it's just taking more stress on that I have more bills to pay with a loan and it won't solve the problem.
I just can't survive anymore. I feel a complete failure to my child as I thought i was doing the right thing working and single parenting. My childs father vanished off the face of the earth when I was 6 months pregnant. So i have no help there. But I feel like giving up work. telling bank to reposess house and going to the social welfare and get rent allowance and help,move somewhere that it's cheaper to live than in the city i live in at the moment. but I'll be away from any friends and her friends etc.but i just keep thinking i won't have this knot in my stomach and panic at how i'm going to survive. I wouldn't have this mad mortgage anymore and high creche fees.
I feel so sick and don't know what to do. This just keep getting worse.I know i have to go to an agency to talk about how to manage it and get advice but the outgoings are just higher now than incomings, it won't match!! I just want to get into bed,pull the curtains. im so tired from it all.

Constant worry over finances is so stressful.

Have you made cutbacks everywhere you can? Can you get rid of tv packages, phone or internet? Have you got loans or a credit card? Make an appointment with MABS and see can you re-jig your outgoings. It is not as simple as asking the bank to take back your house and getting SW.

You need to change the situation you are in now and when you do change it you will feel better and more in control. Is there anyone you can talk to? Your parents or siblings? Could you look in cheaper childcare? Can you re-negotiate your mortgage with the bank?

Have you checked if you are entitled to FIS? You will be entitled to a payment if your weekly net income is less than €506 and you are working more than 19 hours a week. Please look into this as that no matter how little you may qualify for, you will still get a minimum of €20 each week.

http://www.welfare.ie/EN/Schemes/BirthC ... s/fis.aspx

Also please apply for a Medical/GP visit Card. You should be entitled to at least a GP Visit Card and maybe even a full medical Card - all expenditure is taken into account childare, mortgage, petrol etc. You can check your eligibility here https://www.sspcrs.ie/portal/medapp/

If you have any loans from banks/credit unions get onto them to restructure your payments so you are paying a little less.

Get onto the bank about your mortgage, maybe go interest only for 6 months give yourself a bit of breathing space.

Try cutting back on anything you can if you can even shave €10/€15 off your shopping each week it will help.

Make appointment with MABs asap to go through all your finances.

xxx

Sounds like you are in a tough situation.

A few suggestions

Keep a spending diary to see where your money goes
Do a budget of what is coming in and out.

Try to reduce loan and mortgage repayments.

Look at FIS and medical card.

Eating comes before mortgage repayment.

The MABS website might be helpful.

Realy good advice above .xxxxxxxxxx

Also, just focus on your biggest outgoings to start with, as that's where any changes will have the biggest impact... Could you change from crèche to a childminder, it will invariably be cheaper... Can you approach bank to restructure your mortgage repayments. Tell them what you can afford to pay and see if they can accept that.... You need to something as living like this will drag you down... Could you take in a lodger to help with the mortgage? Something to take the pressure of you... Are your family near, are they supportive, can they help you in the short term...?

Thanks for all the replies ladies.
I have exhausted every route. I don't have ntl and don't have a phone and have the internet at the cheapest rate,just to be able to have some form of communication with the outside world in the evenings.
I have shaved off everything bill that I don't need and even at that I just don't see how it's going to improve.
I had tried for a medical card and was refused. I put in all the bills and mortgage and gave a net amount of what i had to play with at the end. they said it was comfortable. it isn't though.
The bank aren't budging on the mortgage, they have said if i want to go down the route of the government to help out then it's a big procedure and one i should think about wisely.
I hate my job and it's stressful and demanding and so unrewarding and a horrible atmosphere and i collect my child everyday and wonder what's it all about? I try hard not to show that i just can't afford a thing anymore.
I don't know, my family have their own bills and my parents are elderly and I know this would cause them such worry. They woudln' thave the cash to help out and would feel they need to get involved then. I don't want that for them.
I keep thinking to myself why didn't i go xyz route in life. why is everything in the last year gone so horribly wrong.
I'm going to phone mabs tmrw and see if there is any light at the end of the tunnel.but i feel like crying and breaking down every few mins and have to try distract and stop myself.The sad thing is i have pension sitting from a previous job with 5K sitting in it that i can't touch until i retire. Even that would help me breath. it's mine and i can't get it. What's the point when i retire when i'm trying to live now!

Have you looked at MARP - Mortgage Arrears Protection Scheme? It is a big step but it will give you breathing space to look at your options without the intense pressure that you are feeling at the moment.

I know it is zero consolation but your situation is not unique, you've done nothing wrong. You did exactly what thousands upon thousands of people did, you bought a home.

Excellent advice above, hopefully you can negotiate some wiggle room, the knot in your stomach you describe is an awful feeling , I know its not easy but try and focus on the positives , your child, your health etc. You will find a way through x

Go stright to mabs and also ring st vincent de paul when your back on your feet you can repal it twice .Firstly the bank is playing hard ball but your entitled to interest only and to a pyment break too its not a solution but will help .

Apply again to medical card office and ask for it to be looked at under hardship skeme ,and this time write down all incomings and out goings to show there is a short fall go to hes and sw and sk for interest supplament forms .apply for fis if your paye worker working the allotted hrs .


You need to sit down and go through every thing .food how much do you spend for family of 5 we also have two dogs we spend 125 a week ,so look t putting together a menu ,I recon two can be catered for cheaply ,have simple meals ,turn lights off turn down heat ,wtch spends in small shops they add up keep spending diary , look at changing house insurance check mount you have hse insured for etc .

Who are the bank, they sound like they are being unhelpful. You do have protection under MARP and it should be easy to access.

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Three little ladies and one tiny little man

I really feel for you and understand how difficult it is at the moment for people working and struggling to pay bills. First of all there is some good advice on int he posts so far so please look carefully at them again. i know that in the past people have given me advice but because i think I have done everything i know I am right and I did not double check. So here is my tuppence worth.

Spending - keep a spending diary for a month writing down every single thing you spend even if it is only cents. At the end of the month do up a spreadsheet with various headings and really look at how the money is spent to see if any savings can be made.
Income - make sure you are getting everything you are entitled to reapply for things like medical card and FIS if you haven't already done so. Check your tax cert to make sure you are getting everything you are entitled to a single persons tax credit if you are not already getting. Consult a person who looks at tax to see if you are entitled to tax back, I did this even though I was convnced I was claiming everything I could I still got 250 back. I will pm the person i used. Write to the PRSI and see if you are entitled to a refund there as well.
Make an appointement with MABS and they will talk to you bank and lenders for you and this will relieve the burden.
Prioritise your important bills, mortgage, heat, food over the rest.
At the end of the day you can only pay what you can pay, worrying about it will not change it.
I hope things imporve for you soon.

Some good advice given already. I would seriously look at getting a childminder rather than the creche, it should save a few hundred a month which might give you some breathing space. I would imagine your creche bill is probably the next biggest bill to the morgage, how old is your little one, when she goes to school/montessori, that bill should come down drastically.

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hi hun had to reply...we hd similar trouble
ended up going to the bank they wouldn't give us
interest only but they did reduce it by a couple of hundred a month
they did the full review thingy and evenwith the 200 a month less
we still have too much outgoings can't live..so sent letter to the car loan
company and visa and they have reduced the payments....now we are just getting
by never go out buy clothes go away but once the bills and mortgage paid and food
on the table thats all that matters..so hun you puush with the mortgage and don't take
no for an answer or start crying I mean they are gone very hard to deal with at the moment
make sure they know how hard it is for you and check other loans hyou might have and get them
reduced..try stay positive it will all work out xxx

Sounds like your childcare is a big cost. Is your child in school/preschool? A childminder or an au pair might work out better. I know it's hard to move your child when they are happy but it could make a huge difference.

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