MagicMum.com

An Irish forum for mums and mums-to-be - all you need to know about parenting and a lot, lot more!
It is currently Wed Jun 19, 2013 11:36 am

All times are UTC [ DST ]




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 24 posts ] 
Author Message
PostPosted: Wed May 09, 2012 8:19 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 17, 2007 4:26 am
Posts: 4424
anyone else have such a stupid job that they cannot get off for a family funeral.my gran passed away this morning,funeral monday,loads of time but no dh will not be able to get the time,max 1 hour,i live 40mins away have to drag the 2 kids on my own to this.and it will take all day to be honest, stupid mean hse.i hate when his job and the people in it come before us.

_________________
My gorgeous girls new year pumpkin is 4 and my star is 2!!
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed May 09, 2012 8:21 pm 
Offline

Joined: Thu Mar 12, 2009 9:27 am
Posts: 2918
So sorry for your loss.

And what a stupid job! Seriously that is awful, I know at the time of my grands's funeral I actually wasn't fit for it on my own and that was pre the boys...

Will pm you


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed May 09, 2012 8:25 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Fri Apr 06, 2007 9:28 pm
Posts: 8264
God thats awful, I am sorry for your loss Granada x

_________________
Image


Image

Image


Find a job you love and you will never work a day in your life


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed May 09, 2012 8:36 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Fri Jul 15, 2005 9:27 pm
Posts: 9726
Location: Waterford
I am so sorry to hear that very frustrating . i work for the hse and the policy is very much immediate family but they do extend to aunts and uncles . What we tend to do if this happens is contact all of our work mates and arrange a swap etc and management usually ok with this . most people when asked to swap under these circumstances will do so . has he anyone he could do this with and agree to do there shift at a later date . I know i prob would not have got the time off without a swap .

_________________
ImageImage


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed May 09, 2012 8:54 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 17, 2007 4:26 am
Posts: 4424
Moto Moto wrote:
I am so sorry to hear that very frustrating . i work for the hse and the policy is very much immediate family but they do extend to aunts and uncles . What we tend to do if this happens is contact all of our work mates and arrange a swap etc and management usually ok with this . most people when asked to swap under these circumstances will do so . has he anyone he could do this with and agree to do there shift at a later date . I know i prob would not have got the time off without a swap .

there is only him in his position no one to swop with and his superior is on hols.i know the policy but he has never been sick always obliges .its just frustrating and the thought of it is exhausting.

_________________
My gorgeous girls new year pumpkin is 4 and my star is 2!!
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed May 09, 2012 9:33 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 17, 2007 4:26 am
Posts: 4424
morphy wrote:
I'm sorry for your loss and sorry you will have to go to the funeral alone. Quite a few years ago similar happened to us, DH could not get time off to come to my 15yos funeral with me :( Really shitty!

thanks.i know it could be worse.i know lots of mums doing it all alone,.just feeling cross.i will be fine on monday.

_________________
My gorgeous girls new year pumpkin is 4 and my star is 2!!
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed May 09, 2012 10:01 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jun 28, 2006 7:55 pm
Posts: 5296
Location: Here!!
That's really crap Granada. I'm sorry for your loss, and I hope you have other family around you on the day.
Morphy that's terrible. I can't believe they wouldn't let him off in that circumstance. I'm so sorry for your loss :(

_________________
1 big boy, 13
1 small boy, 8
1 tiny boy, 3


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed May 09, 2012 10:25 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Mon Aug 30, 2004 9:48 pm
Posts: 24103
I'm sorry for your loss.

I took my daughter to my grannys funeral this year. I had childcare for the boys but none for my daughter. I didn't think to ask dh to take time off work.

I've seen you write on here a few times how you've no back up/support. You should really look in to getting some childcare provision for cases of urgent need. Especially seeing as your dh's job is inflexible in nature.

_________________
Infertility is not a choice but treatment should be


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed May 09, 2012 10:27 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jun 28, 2006 7:55 pm
Posts: 5296
Location: Here!!
Ah that explains it to Morphy. Not that it wasn't a sad loss, but I really thought they were not letting him go to his step child's funeral.
Just wondering if you would have anyone to mind the kids for you Granada? It might be easier for you to go without them.

_________________
1 big boy, 13
1 small boy, 8
1 tiny boy, 3


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed May 09, 2012 11:43 pm 
Offline

Joined: Wed Mar 07, 2012 1:49 pm
Posts: 1373
Sorry about your Gran. Just checking did you dh actually tell his bosses how important it was to get the time off and state to them that he really needs it; that it would be limited to say 2 hours etc, and agree to use a half day's leave to cover this if they were going to give him funeral time. Or has he decided himself that as he is so busy it would be impossible to get cover and there is no point pushing it. He may just have said 'I suppose I cant get a couple of hours off on Friday, we'd be too busy', rather than, 'I have a family funeral I need to go to, but I'll be back.' Your dh sounds very diligent and in my experience it would be very unusual to be refused leave to go to such a funeral, especially if you were proactive about calling in favours to swap positions on rosters etc.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed May 09, 2012 11:46 pm 
Offline

Joined: Thu Jul 09, 2009 7:30 pm
Posts: 2661
is he looking to take holidays or be given time off ??


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed May 09, 2012 11:49 pm 
Offline

Joined: Wed Mar 07, 2012 1:49 pm
Posts: 1373
Sorry I didn't realise he would need the whole day, read the max 1 hour bit incorrectly. The maximum funeral time you would get is 1 hour as it's not direct family but does he have the annual leave to take the day off ?


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed May 09, 2012 11:56 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 17, 2007 4:26 am
Posts: 4424
he is not allowed take any time,ie annual leave etc
there is no one to swop with,if he does not go in people turn up to appts and he is not there.hse has skelton staffing no no one at same level to swop with ,his boss is away.the 1 hour is all he can juggle with appt slots,just annoys me as every day he comes home and tells me how people did not show up to their appts without ringing etc .anyway there is a crying room in the church so i will take the girls there and be fine,extended family will help me after that.my relationship with my granny was a bit different in that i lived with her so she has been in both our lives perhaps a bit more than some other grandparents iykwim.

_________________
My gorgeous girls new year pumpkin is 4 and my star is 2!!
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu May 10, 2012 12:08 am 
Offline

Joined: Thu Jul 21, 2005 12:09 pm
Posts: 20184
Honestly, I think he can arrange something. He could phone some of the appts, explain there was a family funeral and reschedule. You deserve to come first at a time like this. I worked in the HSE for many years and understand how hard it is but family comes first sometimes.

_________________
Proud mum of 3. DD1 Skinny Minny 10! DD2 My Sensitive Soul 8! DS The Bulldozer A big 6!!!!!!!!!Image

Image


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu May 10, 2012 12:11 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 17, 2007 4:26 am
Posts: 4424
Allgirlz wrote:
Honestly, I think he can arrange something. He could phone some of the appts, explain there was a family funeral and reschedule. You deserve to come first at a time like this. I worked in the HSE for many years and understand how hard it is but family comes first sometimes.

really would that be allowed or will they complain?my dd2 is a ball of loveliness but will not go to anyone but me and dh so i could really do with him,rather than just family,i need him.i am going to get on his case,gently though,as i was talking to my mum earlier and she said he rang her upset that he can't get the time off,i didn't know this.

_________________
My gorgeous girls new year pumpkin is 4 and my star is 2!!
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu May 10, 2012 12:13 am 
Offline

Joined: Thu Jul 05, 2007 8:05 pm
Posts: 10197
But if you had waited months for an appointment at a clinic would you be happy with that allgirlz? I can see his problem, there just aren't enough staff to cope with these kind of situations.

_________________
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu May 10, 2012 12:14 am 
Offline

Joined: Thu Jul 21, 2005 12:09 pm
Posts: 20184
Of course it's allowed. If you got a phonecall from a consultant/secretary/HSE service provider to reschedule an appointment would you complain? As a mammy I had to do it several times and I still looked after all the people I worked with well. He's not going to make someone wait months for a rescheduled appt - there is always room to fit in a half-day's worth of clients.

_________________
Proud mum of 3. DD1 Skinny Minny 10! DD2 My Sensitive Soul 8! DS The Bulldozer A big 6!!!!!!!!!Image

Image


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu May 10, 2012 12:15 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 17, 2007 4:26 am
Posts: 4424
Allgirlz wrote:
Of course it's allowed. If you got a phonecall from a consultant/secretary/HSE service provider to reschedule an appointment would you complain? As a mammy I had to do it several times and I still looked after all the people I worked with well. He's not going to make someone wait months for a rescheduled appt - there is always room to fit in a half-day's worth of clients.

thanks.

_________________
My gorgeous girls new year pumpkin is 4 and my star is 2!!
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu May 10, 2012 12:20 am 
Offline

Joined: Thu Jul 21, 2005 12:09 pm
Posts: 20184
It sounds like he is a very committed professional but so was I with the HSE and so am I in my current post. My uncle died in September. I missed two days from work. I had to reschedule every single hour of that time but I swapped with colleagues and no-one lost out (well I had to work a lot harder to fit everything in but gladly did so as I got to go to the funeral and be there for my mother and her family). It's only a few hours. Hope you find a way to go together. It's your beloved grandmother. YOU need your DH with you. I'm so sorry for your loss. A

_________________
Proud mum of 3. DD1 Skinny Minny 10! DD2 My Sensitive Soul 8! DS The Bulldozer A big 6!!!!!!!!!Image

Image


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu May 10, 2012 12:29 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 17, 2007 4:26 am
Posts: 4424
thanks allgirlz,thanks all.i hope he can juggle something.rather i rant here than at him today.

_________________
My gorgeous girls new year pumpkin is 4 and my star is 2!!
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu May 10, 2012 12:32 am 
Offline

Joined: Wed Mar 07, 2012 1:49 pm
Posts: 1373
A funeral is something that you can't plan for but will come up. For goodness sake there is even force majeure leave for events that occur which you could not foresee and time off is required( for example if your child was in hospital, upset in the family etc-tricky to apply for but it's there) And in many families the death of a granny is a very big deal. I think it is is up to the Managers to come up with a solution so he can take the time off, their job, not his. Allgirlz is dead right. It's a reasonable request for time off. He will be seeing these patients anyway, just at a re-scheduled time. The crisis in the HSE will not be resolved by your dh working instead of attending a funeral that he should really be at.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu May 10, 2012 7:58 am 
Offline

Joined: Wed Oct 28, 2009 10:12 am
Posts: 3267
You cant take force majeure for a funeral and you can only take it if your annual leave is all gone, well thats here anyway - you can hardly ever get it as leave,

In the HSE we get

Immediate Relative: 3 days
Grandparent 1 day
Brother /Sister-in-Law 1 day
Uncle/Aunt/Niece/Nephew 0.5 days

_________________
If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, ' thank you,' that would suffice.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu May 10, 2012 9:23 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Thu Sep 08, 2005 11:37 am
Posts: 5504
lazeedaisy wrote:
You cant take force majeure for a funeral and you can only take it if your annual leave is all gone, well thats here anyway - you can hardly ever get it as leave,

In the HSE we get

Immediate Relative: 3 days
Grandparent 1 day
Brother /Sister-in-Law 1 day
Uncle/Aunt/Niece/Nephew 0.5 days


You cannot take force majore in the event of a death of a close family member, its up to the discreation of your employer, but most employers do have compassion, I know here we can take time for death in family
http://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/em ... _work.html

_________________
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu May 10, 2012 6:23 pm 
Offline

Joined: Thu Jul 21, 2005 12:09 pm
Posts: 20184
Any update Granada?

_________________
Proud mum of 3. DD1 Skinny Minny 10! DD2 My Sensitive Soul 8! DS The Bulldozer A big 6!!!!!!!!!Image

Image


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 24 posts ] 

All times are UTC [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: beaneybaby, Cannoli, jensner, skipper, sunshineJ and 3 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group