Big Kids

'My daughter is not special because of her cystic fibrosis'

A mum's account of her struggle caring for her daughter with cystic fibrosis has become one of Ireland's fastest spreading stories, after she hit out at people calling her 'special'.

In her post Calling Bullshit On Special Children Are Only Sent To Special Parents, mum-of-two Bernie Martin lifted the lid on feeling patronised by people when they hear about her daughter Eva's CF.

"As a ‘special’ parent of a ‘special’ child, I’ve tried to ignore how these phrases creep under my skin and make me itch ferociously, but I can’t stifle it any longer," Bernie wrote in the post on  The M Word.

"So I’m sticking my neck out and calling bullshit on both.

"You see, while ‘special parents’ appreciate the intentions, we can’t help but feel more than a little patronised by these wise words.

"Why? Because we’re not special. We’re parents, just like everyone else. Parents who got a bombshell landed in the middle of their living room granted, but average, human parents nonetheless!"

Bernie, who runs her own blog, Little Miss Salty – an account of raising a child with CF – describes herself as a CF campaigner, blogger. frequently opinionated, frequently tired.

She added: "I don’t believe any of our ‘special’ children ‘chose’ us because we are inherently or divinely ‘special’, but I do believe they teach us lots of special skills along the way."

Since Bernie's account was posted, it has been shared and liked more than 16,000 times, and received an outpouring of support from The M Word readers.

"This is perfect! As the mum of a very special little girl, this just sums it up so well!" wrote one. 

Another said: "Great you had the courage to say what most of us feel, I always hated when people said that to me."

Commenting on the post, Maia Dunphy, said: "Only Bernie could have written it. And she put it so eloquently."

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